All Entries Tagged With: "Missouri Department of Transportation"
XXL Shirtle Wreck
Webster County, MO—After overturning, a t-shirt toting tractor-trailer spilled its load on Interstate 44 blocking the westbound lanes with garments imprinted with witty phrases emblazoned in a variety of interesting and hard-to-read fonts. The Missouri Department of Transportation reported finding thousands of shirts with messages proclaiming, “That’s What She Said”, “What Wouldn’t Jesus Do?” and […]
Traffic Cones Outnumber Ozarks Population 3:1
Springfield, MO—Recent statistics show that for every Ozark inhabitant, three highway cones exist. The rise in traffic cone population is directly related to the numerous construction projects occurring around the area. Missouri Department of Transportation officials confirm that approximately 500,000 cones exist within Springfield city limits. Citizens are allowed to take the allotted cones once […]
Prehistoric Monument Found at Interchange
Springfield, MO— A prehistoric monument was uncovered in southern Greene County today at the U.S. 65-U.S. 60 interchange and dubbed “Springhenge”. The iconic stone monument is composed of earthworks lined in a setting of large standing stones and sits at the centre of the densest complex of Ozarkian and Springfieldian forests in Missouri, including several […]
Empire Adopted Highway Renamed for Rebel Alliance Leader Admiral Ackbar
Springfield, MO—It started in October with a crude but effective public relations move by members of the dark side, officially called the Springfield Unit of the Galactic Empire. Exercising their First Amendment rights, they succeeded in getting MoDOT to let them erect a sign for their group along West Bypass, between Sunshine and Farm Road […]
MoDOT’s Highway Hijinks Confuse, Entertain
SPRINGFIELD, MO—The Missouri Department of Transportation says this is the best practical joke they have ever pulled and they are enjoying every moment of it. On Monday they unveiled the first interchange of its kind in the United States, and it’s now open in north Springfield. It’s a diverging diamond interchange at I-44 and Kansas […]
