All Entries Tagged With: "Driving under the influence"
Alco-Haul Longs for Prohibition
Springfield, MO—Management of local beer and wine delivery service, Alco-Haul, recently stated that they wished that Prohibition would be reenacted to bring more excitement to their job. The team argues that if alcohol were outlawed, delivery of products would be much more fun as they would have to shake the fuzz while making the […]
Lawn Mower Racer Arrested for DUI
CARTERVILLE, MO—A slobbering, stinky man has been charged with racing a lawn mower while sipping on grandpa’s cough syrup. Police Chief Howard says Jamie Dennison, 47, was arrested Friday on an overpass of Missouri 171 at Carterville, north of Joplin. Howard says Dennison, who lives in a trailer near Carterville, has a revoked driver’s license […]
Fuzz Challenge Drunks to Dodge Saturation
Buffalo, MO—Missouri Highway Patrol Troop D will conduct four driving-while-intoxicated saturations in Dallas County in June, July, and August with no element of surprise. So if you’re planning to drink those months in that area well, let this serve as a heads-up. Areas selected for enforcement are based on a high number of drinking-related traffic […]
