All Entries Tagged With: "Business Services"
“Safe Place” Signs Scare Locals
Springfield, MO—Springfield residents have been avoiding locations that display signs with the “Safe Place” logo, which features a large yellow creature sneaking up behind and grabbing another person. “I’m not going anywhere near those signs,” said resident, Julie Watterson, “I don’t want to be grabbed.” Like Watterson, most people have interpreted the logo to mean […]
Devil Scorpion Turn Ahead
Springfield, MO—Tuesday a motorist encountered a strange street sign and became confused as to the signs intentions. Jill Montery said, “It looked like there was a strange devil scorpion warning sign. I just did a quick u-turn and avoided the street altogether. I don’t like those nasty tailed lizards.” Others have found the sign to […]
Stone County Tornado Caller
Abesville, MO—Emergency management executives in Stone County will soon hire a Tornado Caller once the aging, expensive-to-maintain tornado/storm sirens are removed June 1st. The county says the existing sirens are too expensive to maintain and “having Ol’ Lou make the rounds in his pick ‘em up truck a hollerin’ a folks” will be much more […]
New Signs Promote New Sign Locations
Springfield, MO—City officials hope that new signs located around town will better inform citizens on the best place to find new signs. Originally meant to point tourists to locations such as Bass Pro Shops, Battlefield Mall and Commercial Street, the new wayfarer signs will instead point to new sign locations. “We were so proud of […]
Ozarks Reportedly Forced Into Time Warp
Springfield, MO—Local residents were reportedly forced into a strange and unexpected time warp Sunday which may be linked to an ancient tradition of sun worship. Several residents experienced the movement of time and space by exactly one hour. “I woke up and started getting ready when I noticed that my phone and computer clocks were […]
KY3 to Sell StormTracker 1, 2
Springfield, MO—Officials at KY3 have announced plans to auction off old weather forecasting equipment given the proven reliance of StormTracker3. StormTracker1 & StormTracker2 will be listed at a public auction this weekend. All proceeds will go toward the the purchase of future needs and an anticipated StormTracker4. During a dramatic camera pan Chief Meteorologist Ron […]
“Speed Hump” Signs Around the Block
Springfield, MO—City officials are standing firm behind their decision to post a sign stating “Speed Hump” on St. Louis Street, west of downtown indicating a bump used to reduce vehicle speed. Opponents have suggested that the sign promotes promiscuity at high velocity and state the original authors are out of touch with modern conversation. Proponents […]
