All Entries Tagged With: "Art"
Work Out Art Revealed at Mercy
Springfield, MO – Located on the Mercy campus in Springfield, a new piece of art has been intentionally designed to be dual purpose; a thing of beauty and a machine for making beautiful bodies. The apparatus is available for anyone who chooses to work out and participate in performance art. “We installed the ‘WorkArt’ as […]
Som-Bitch Soldier Decorations Now Available
Springfield, MO – Som-bitches around the Ozarks can now express their holiday spirit by placing an oversized, blown-up, redneck soldier in their yards. The crop-top wearin’, belly-showing, mustached inflatable is complete with hunting cap and beer can in the left hand. According to the manufacturer Hey Y’all Watch This, consumer demand for a more culturally […]
Crumbly-Building Man Fails to Save Costume Shop
Springfield, MO – The former “Costume Shop” near downtown Springfield at Main Avenue and W. Nichols Street collapsed despite the efforts of superhero Crumbly-Building Man, who was eating lunch close-by at Pappy’s Place. “He comes in every week for the lunch special. But today was different. During lunch he kept mentioning that his ‘crumbly-building senses’ […]
Sidewalk Improv Starting on Glenstone
Springfield, MO— This summer promises to be the most improvisationally-filled sidewalk summer in history as road signs indicate that teams of improv players will be taking to the sidewalks on Glenstone avenue soon. “Ah, yeah I saw the signs for sidewalk improv and I was all like stoked for the hilarity on my walk […]
Boyfriends Run In Terror As Tent Theatre Opens
Springfield, MO- All across Springfield many boyfriends are hiding in terror as MSU’s Tent Theatre prepares to premier their opening night. The boyfriends are in hiding because they know their girlfriends will mercilessly force them to see one of the three plays and would rather plunge themselves off a cliff than see garish musicals […]
Sweltering Heat Places Ozarks in Slow Motion
Springfield, MO—Extreme temperatures have forced everyday folk to live their lives in an altered state of reality: slow motion. The burdening heat has forced Springfield residents’ movements to lag, speech to slur and general motion to be delayed. Said one local man, Nate Gringer, “Muhh llliiiifffeeee iiiiissss sssssooooo ssssssllllooooowwww” as his mouth struggled to […]
Meat Clothier Moves to Ozarks
Springfield, MO – Franc Fernandez, creator of Lady Gaga’s infamous “meat dress” was seen in downtown Springfield last week looking for studio space. According to sources close to the designer, Fernandez is looking to create more meat and animal inspired designs and therefore moving to the Midwest close to farmlands is a natural progression […]
No Pants Celebrated at Local Subway
Springfield, MO—Local participants in the “No Pants Subway Ride Day” had little choice to display their pant-less selves other than at the local Subway restaurant. Scores of Ozarkers showed up to the Subway location at 605 E. Harrison Street to take part in the global annual tradition started by Improv Everywhere in 2002. “We here […]
Springfield Initiates Goth Relocation Program
Springfield, MO – Under the guise of center city beautification, the city of Springfield quietly began the first phase of it’s long term plan to eradicate downtown undesirables. The square has been fenced off and bulldozers have started to rip up sidewalks, steps and benches once perched upon by the city’s indigenous Goth and Vampire […]
Art Walk Preferred Over Science Stroll
Springfield, MO—Early reports indicate that when given the choice, Springfieldians would rather attend the monthly Art Walk versus the Science Stroll. Both events occur on the first Friday of the month in separate locations in downtown Springfield. The First Friday Art Walk takes place in multiple galleries situated near the heart of downtown. The Science […]
Artsfest Inspires Precipitation
Springfield—Walnut Street swelled with crowds ready to browse the art filled curbs intent to celebrate spring this past weekend. Tents filled with crafts, paintings and foods align annually at this time of the year to form Artsfest. Unbeknownst to the casual observer, this ritual triggers a predictable climactic change known as “rain”. World-renowned climatologist Dr. […]
