All Entries in the "Education" Category
Ozarks Emperor Very Much Pleased with His Fair
Springfield, MO- Grand Emperor of the Ozarks, Jo Bob Billius, was very much pleased with the glorious fair placed in his honor. Jo Bob traveled down from his majestic mountain fortress of Moon-Shan’gri-La and was greeted by his numerous subjects. Riding a “mule” (a mythical and wondrous beast combining a donkey and a horse) the […]
Misfit Fraternity Surprisingly Not On Valued Land
Springfield MO-Lamba Alpha Mu, a fraternity of losers and misfits brought together by the shunning of their peers, found out yesterday that the land under their house, affectingly called “The Heap” was totally useless yesterday. This was a huge surprise to Brett Masterson the president of the most popular and powerful fraternity on campus: Alpha […]
Two Trains Equation Solved In Sleeper, MO
Sleeper, MO—Two trains collided on the main BNSF line between Springfield and St. Louis last Monday morning answering the 7th grade algebra question: Where will two trains meet if train A leaves Springfield traveling at 35 mph and train B leaves St. Louis traveling at 45 mph? In Sleeper, Missouri just north of Lebanon. Three […]
MSU Student Welcome ‘Package’ Features Condom
Springfield, MO—A controversial welcome ‘package’ was sent to thousands of potential Missouri State University students recently. The student mailer included condoms and an ad for a sexually erotic store. Parents are outraged. The packet included condoms from Planned Parenthood and a $15 coupon for the erotic Adam & Eve store. It was sent to an […]
MSU Drops “M” From Name
MSU proposed name change to SU Jefferson City – The president of Missouri State University, Dr. Michael T. Nietzel, said he proposed last week that the University of Missouri support a name change for his institution and discussed enhancing collaboration between the two universities. Support for the name change would coincide with the school’s centennial […]
