Skateport King Loses Battle to MODOT, Rink to Close

Skate King Barry in his Kingdom

Skate King Barry in his Kingdom

Springfield, MO –Skateport King Barry Melvin released a statement announcing the closure of Skateport next year, a place that some consider a local landmark. The closure was deemed necessary by MODOT and is expected to ease congestion on south Glenstone with a new access road located at the site.

Melvin appointed himself “King of Skateport” during the first year of operation when he won every speed skate challenge, earned the top scores on all pinball machines and perfected his suicide soda formula.

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Some precious memories include: Grabbing the girl you dig and impressing her with your ability to skate backwards slowly while skating with her, sulking quietly on the edges of the rink or the dining area longing for someone to couple skate with and continuing to whoop ass at Cruisn’ USA to hide the pain of not having someone to enjoy the couple-skate with.

Several people plan to visit the business one last time to take one more whack at lacing up the skates, ask that one person for a couples skate and search for a joint they stuffed in the bathroom cracks. Rumors are circulating that the Springfield Roller Girls are planning to protest the demolition by strapping themselves to the plastic benches.

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