National Parks Reopen: Deer, Turkey, Wildlife Return to Work

Park owl questioning the validity of the shutdown

Springfield, MO – Following the reopening of the Federal government, wildlife across the Ozarks have returned to work at parks across the region. Thousands of Ozarks animals were furloughed during the shutdown and many were happy to return to their normal lives.

“I was so sick of not working…staying in the cave with about 40 other deer was very depressing. We just hung out and played cards, dominoes, whatever for the first week. Which was cool. But after week two and three, we were all ready to get back to prancing through the woods and sneaking off property to eat flower beds,” said Grump, a nearby white tail deer.

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The shutdown affected a variety of working animals, all of which had to find alternate ways of providing for their families. “As we were locked out of the normal grazing lands, we ordered nuts and fruits from Amazon,” said Newie the squirrel, “some of my family actually had to dig into winter reserves, which was a last resort. We’re going to help replenish those supplies but it will take a long time.”

Sentiment among the wildlife was generally positive. However, some were visibly upset about the stress placed upon them. “I haven’t had, like, one person to scare in weeks,” said Marty the mountain lion, “I’ve spent years stalking humans and pretending I’m not here, but I am! C’mon government let us do our jobs!”