Prancercising Man Trampled By Horse

Horse commended for actions

Springfield, MO – A local man attempting to prancercise was run down and trampled by a horse. Witnesses said the horse was horrified that any human would employ “a springy, rhythmic way of moving forward, similar to a horse’s gait” for exercise and immediately bolted toward the man nostrils flared, head down.

“I’ve never seen a man trampled by a horse before, but this guy deserved it,” said Nate Kohnson, “I mean what the hell was he thinking?” According to sources, the man has been identified as Terry Krinshaw, 32. Krinshaw was interviewed from his hospital bed at Cox South and revealed that he was only interested in trying out the newest get-fit-fast trend to prepare for a job interview.
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“I went to the square because, well I didn’t think I’d stand out prancercising. I mean there are a lot of strange things going on down there. But I was wrong. I didn’t even know horses were allowed inside the city,” said Krinshaw.

Local authorities quickly captured the horse, gave it an apple as a reward and encouraged other horses to kick and stomp anyone else who attempts to lose weight, tone or otherwise enjoy themselves by prancercising in public.