Climate Change Nerds Ruin Seasonally Warm Weather

Weather nerd ruins the funshine

Springfield, MO-  While most Springfield residents were pleasantly surprised by the warm weather yesterday, a bunch of egg-head losers actually complained about the 70 degree temperatures.  The

know-it -all nerds told various residents that even though the warm days are nice now, climate change will have dire consequences in the future.

“While you all are enjoying your walks and Frisbee games, our Earth’s average temperature is drastically changing. I bet your hacky sack will be real fun in a nightmarish hellscape that the Ozarks will be in a couple of decades,” said Eugene P. Brainestiein in a whiny voice much like Droopy the dog.

In a response Chip Arroten, star quarter back of the 1995 Hilldale Tigers, chucked a football at the scientist and yelled: “Think fast.”

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“I can’t believe this,” said Thaddeus Q. Mindman. “We tried to tell a group of youths about how if they don’t watch their carbon footprints it will be like this all the time. And they just laughed and made of my glasses. But, they were all wearing thicker glasses than me…and weird facial hair and Instagraming me while I was talking.”

The scientist had planned a symposium for questions the community may have about the disastrous future that awaits them, but most the community went to an impromptu outside bluegrass concert.

“I guess you can’t change people’s hearts, but you can‘t quit. Can‘t let the man get you down not one bit ,” said local bluegrass celebrity Chuck Conners while playing a song.

Of course he was alluding to the Coal Miner’s Strike of 1905, the topic of most of their songs.