More Time to Text & Driving During Bad Weather

Texting increases during snowy conditions and slow drive times

Springfield, MO – Drivers experienced more time to text and drive on Tuesday as a slight dusting of snow snarled traffic to a standstill on most major thoroughfares. Barely 1/8” of God’s powder covered city streets signaling the all-clear for creeping vehicle speeds, over-cautious braking and snail’s pace right-hand turns.

“Effing shoot me in the face, this driver is NSANE” tweeted Noah Figero as he drove and texted down Glenstone tailgating a weather-impaired motorist. Figero found it a bit harder to text on his mobile device as his fingers were a bit colder than usual, however he had more time to make sure he properly struck the appropriate keys given traffic speeds were reduced to 5-6 MPH.

City of Springfield officials indicated that roads were especially slippery but most motorist were alerted to poor driving conditions by checking their facebook accounts while pulling out of their own driveways. “I was pulling out, checking my tweetdeck and facebook and saw that most people were either sliding into a ditch or bitching about other people’s driving. I knew it was going to be a slow ride to work. I just updated my FB to read ‘take your time while driving today’ as I backed out, put on my seatbelt and ate a Ho-Ho and drank some coffee while inserting the new CD into my car’s in-dash stereo. Safety first people,” said Herm Yolander of Ozark, MO.

Several motorists tweeted collisions to @SGFPolice as they drove by in the slippery streets to report accidents, before they themselves wrecked into the car in front of them.

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