Businessman Offers to Not Develop Heer’s Building for Fifty Dollars
FairCityNews.com | Aug 26, 2010 | Comments 0
Springfield, MO—Local maverick businessman, Sonny Pomade, showed up at Monday night’s Springfield City Council meeting and offered to not develop the controversial Heer’s Building for a mere fifty dollars.
“I just felt it was my duty to take the burden of not moving forward with the renovation on my own shoulders,” Pomade commented, as he sipped on decaf at a sidewalk table in front of The Coffee Ethic, shaded by the afternoon shadow of the iconic monolith.
“The City Council is going to fork over two million beans to some guy who claims he will bring the building back to its glory days, with restaurants, offices, a fortune teller’s tent, and a ground-level go-cart track, if I’m not mistaken. Get outta here! What if he doesn’t get it done? Can the people of Springfield take another Heer’s letdown? I’m thinking no!”
Pomade stated that he needed the token sum of fifty dollars as a down payment to a representative of a local informal “loan agency” and that the $1,999,950 saved could be used to build a dog track or something the people of Springfield could really get behind.
“In this economy it doesn’t make any sense to spend huge sums of money on projects that aren’t absolutely necessary, or, for that matter, never materialize,” Pomade added. “Besides, people often underestimate the importance of having something to gripe about. Without it some folks might cease to exist. In my opinion my proposal is sound all around. Cheap, too!”
Filed Under: Business