All Entries in the "Living" Category
Truck Trap Foils Two Trucks in Two Days
Springfield, MO—For the second day in a row, another illiterate truck driver has succumbed to the “truck trap” low overpass at the Grant and Commercial intersection. “Man, I could sell tickets to this event. It’s like a free demolition derby out here. Watching vehicles with not too quick drivers try and squeeze under this overpass […]
Long Wait for Cox South ER
Springfield—After 25 years Cox South plans to open a new ER facility in 2010. Some patients waiting to receive medical treatment at the hospital would say that a quarter of a century is how long they usually wait to see a doctor. “I had two axe handles wedged in my throat, three gunshot wounds and […]
Buckingham’s “Catch the Swine Fever” Campaign Cancelled Due to Poor Timing
Buckingham’s new print and television campaign titled “Catch the Swine Fever” has been cancelled today due to the outbreak of Swine Flu that is plaguing Mexico, Asia, and parts of the United States. The campaign with the mottos: “Catch The Swine Fever”, “Swine Fever Will Getcha”, “Swine Fever…Catch It”, “Food So Good You Won’t Want […]
Askinosie Unveils Lasting Gobstopper
Chocolate guru releases new candy format, shares profits. Springfield MO – Shawn Askinosie, Founder and Chocolate Maker of Askinosie Chocolate returned home Friday after a long anticipated trip to Willy Wonka’s Chocolate Factory. The factory, located in Munich, “truly is everybody’s non-pollutionary, anti institutionary, pro-confectionery factory of fun,” Askinosie confirmed. Askinosie is sharing his first […]
