Archive for March, 2014
Staxx of Jelly Beans Reported at Farmer’s Market
Springfield, MO – Children of all ages are thrilled to hear the news that Staxx of Jelly Beans are being moved to the Farmer’s Market of the Ozarks soon. Mountains of jelly beans is exactly what customers expect once the move is complete and nothing less will satisfy the anticipation. “Once I heard ‘stacks, jelly […]
Hurts Donut Got What You Need
Springfield, MO – Local donut shop, Hurts, has announced a new line of baked goods: bismarcks filled with sausage and gravy. Hurts will roll out a new campaign to promote the menu item with famed beatboxer Biz Markie. You should also consume cheap viagra bananas, watermelon, pumpkin seeds, avocado, sesame seeds, pomegranate and almonds. You […]
Mike the Intern
April. Flowers are blooming, things are growing, love is in the air and it makes me sick. So while you are out hooking up with everyone before the semester ends, I am going to sit here and write out the greatest breakup songs of all time. And then go get drunk. When combined with […]
Diverging Diamond Necklace Unveiled at Justice Jewelers
Springfield, MO – Responding to consumers’ demand, and nodding to the unique traffic solutions employed around town, a local jeweler has recently unveiled the Diverging Diamond Necklace. The necklace pays homage to the diverging diamonds found in several Ozarks intersections. “We wanted to celebrate a traffic win for our area. We were the first to […]
Downtown Businesses Expected to Open Secondary Shops in Farmer’s Park
Springfield, MO – According to city code 34.356987, all downtown businesses are now required to open a second location at the new Farmer’s Park. While several businesses have complied with the new regulation others are more reluctant to make the investment. cheap cialis from canada You do not have to go through erectile dysfunction. The […]
Cox South Bungee Jumping Therapy Heals with Thrills
Springfield, MO – Results are coming back positive from an experimental therapy involving a bungee jump at a Southside hospital. Cox South has been treating patients with their Bungee Jump Health Towers installation for the past few months and has experienced impressive recovery rates. “We are always looking for new ways to treat our patients,” […]
Sea Salt French Fries on Display at Art Museum
Springfield, MO – On Thursday, The Art Museum will unveil Natural-Cut Sea Salt Fries — revamped french fries of 100% russet potatoes, cut with the skin on, sprinkled with sea salt. The move comes as sea salt has set consumer hearts aflutter and invaded American mindsets. In 2010, 1,350 new products with sea salt as […]
Meek’s to Open Downtown Gown and Lumber Boutique
Springfield, MO – An unlikely business has jumped on board the downtown renovation momentum. Meek’s has opened Meek’s Gown and Lumber Boutique on the northeast corner of South and Walnut. Meek’s VP of regional development, Andy Walser, acknowledged that it was a unique choice saying, “It will be the first of its kind anywhere in […]
College Station Gravel Museum Celebrates Seven Year Anniversary
Springfield, MO – Touted as one of the premiere gravel museums in the world, College Station Gravel Museum in downtown Springfield, plans to celebrate tonight with an open house free to the public. “It’s hard to imagine that it has been seven years,” says curator, Scott Fillmen. “When we opened back in 2007 our goal […]
Ozarkers Thankful for Endless Winter
Springfield, MO – Residents had reason to celebrate yet another winter storm this week as thundersleet, snow and freezing temperatures blanketed the Ozarks. Locals had feared that another winter weather pattern wouldn’t been seen until next year but those fears were relieved when the old man winter crapped out another round of shitty weather. “I […]
