Archive for September, 2012
Missouri Politicians Are Upset Arizona is Trying to Out-Crazy Them
Springfield, MO- Mere weeks after Todd Akin’s “shut down” gaffe in which he explains a woman’s body can naturally shut down parts of her body, Arizona law makers are trying to pass a bill stating that life begins two weeks before conception. “This is ridiculous,” says Missouri Senator Claude Maxwell. “We had the corner on […]
Claire McCaskill Plays Hooky From DNC
St. Petersburg, MO- Claire McCaskill decided to play hooky with her friends than go to the “totally boring” snooze feast of the DNC. Senior members of the democratic party are very disappointed in the irresponsible actions of the precocious youth. Claire was not available for comment and allegedly causing mischief all over the Ozarks. The […]
Mother Nature to Missouri: Is That Enough Water For You, You Babies?
Springfield, MO- With rain seemingly falling constantly for a period of days, many Ozarkians are wondering why this rain could not come earlier to relieve the drought ridden summer. In yesterday’s press conference Mother Nature was very direct in her answer. “You whiners complained about no rain all summer. Well, you want some water? Here […]
